Marcel: So where are you?
Me: Vancouver.
Marcel: I always hear really great things about the fish market there.
Me: I don't like fish, sorry :x
Marcel: You and I, we're never speaking again. Never.
Marcel: Do you talk to other people like this?
Me: Well, not like this :x The only other guy I've swooped in from the heavens to specifically harass is Tyce Diorio, he's this choreographer who was -
Marcel: Wait. Tyce Diorio? What does he look like? I think I've met him.
Me: ...
Marcel: Oh, him. Yeah, I've met him briefly. He wanted some of this.
Me: Never say that again. And you're not his type.
Marcel: He's not my type either.
Me: No.
Marcel: Fucking lesbians always have the best gaydar. I bet yours is way better than mine, I can never tell.
Me: ...
Marcel: You didn't even have to ask!
Me: ...
Marcel: What? Why are you looking at me like that?
Me: ...you have a lovebird named Rex.
Marcel: ...how can I tell how you're looking at me? This is so weird.
Marcel: I'm bisexual, anyway. I've had girlfriends.
Me: Wow, I'm legi - after high school?
Marcel: No, I just haven't found any women I wanted to date.
Me: Your high school girlfriends' parents must have loved you.
Marcel: What are you insinuating?
Me: Nothing.
Marcel: Fuck you.
Marcel: I could sue you for sexual harassment.
Me: No you couldn't.
Marcel: No, I couldn't.
Me: Jesus christ, you're even tinier than I thought you were.
Marcel: What?
Me: ...I meant short, dude.
Marcel: You better have. And not -
Me: Short as in stature.
Marcel: You're damn right.